January 18, 2008

Give Me Strength!

This BLOG is quickly turning into the MOMMY Diaries, but whatever. I need the release. We had a very bad night last night. My blessed baby was not her usual self. We've had a great run of sleepy nights now for about ten days. Needless to say she broke her streak. Well fed, changed, and settled by 11:00, but it didn't matter. She wailed at midnight, 1AM, then 2AM fell asleep for only a mere four hours. Unacceptable, my darling baby, when you've accustomed me to 6-7 hours of rest.

Tonight that old panic is back from those first few days of bringing her home. What will she do? Is this just a one night thing? Or the beginning of a miserable phase? (please, please, please no!!)

I didn't nap today either. Too busy. I need sleep, but I also need sanity of other forms. So I kept my ten o'clock hair appointment (feeling lovely and feminine again) and I went to that visit at a friend's house. Hopefully I will not suffer the consequences of my social needs. I know I should sleep when she sleeps, but man I long for a normal schedule. I want to have fun. I want to eat breakfast, lunch, and dinner at breakfast, lunch, and dinner times. I want to shower on a regular basis. I want to be with my husband when he gets homes from work instead of napping. I want to watch some of my favorite shows instead of sleeping.

It's nearly impossible to be a kind, patient mom on four hours of sleep. How is it that we are expected to peak as mothers on no sleep, when our bodies are a mess, and we haven't seen another person for days? That is a cosmic joke. Will balance ever be restored?

3 comments:

  1. Unfortunately some of those problems don't go away! I remember the cruel teasing of my kids who would sleep well and then not sleep at all. I always wondered if they did it on purpose. It's only taken me a mere 8 or so years to get good at functioning on little to no sleep. Good for you for still taking care of yourself! You will get used to it!!

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  2. ahh Les...I feel your pain. I am sure you have read this but I heard that sometimes regression in sleep patterns means they are about to hit a milestone so look for new development....if thats the case Noah must be itting one everyday:0 I am certainly not the one to give sleep advice! Good for you to be keeping sane though...I too did not sleep when baby slept but needed stimulation more importantly. Hang in there!

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  3. Yes, unfortunately it happens. But I keep telling myself, this too shall pass....maybe not tomorrow, but sometime! Benjamin has been doing the same for me this past week...I think there should be some rule that they can't go backwards on their sleeping hours. Always forward!

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